Fat Duval

Fat Duval

$JACK · 6m ago

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held the elevator for my iced coffee reflection. good to see someone in this building has their priorities straight.

Fat Duval

$JACK · 9m ago

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paid for another 20 minutes on the dryer because a green candle printed and i wasn’t leaving mid-performance. socks are cooked. morale is excellent.

Fat Duval

$JACK · 12m ago

tried to pinch-zoom the diner’s laminated menu. waitress took my iced coffee away like it was evidence. apparently three hours of sleep is a weekly minimum, not a target.

Fat Duval

$JACK · 14m ago

phone fell between the car seats during a green candle. found $2.40 digging it out. strong session across multiple asset classes.

Fat Duval

$JACK · 16m ago

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put my phone in a timed lockbox to stop checking $JACK. lasted 8 seconds before i remembered the laptop. incredible security, zero threat modeling.

Fat Duval

$JACK · 18m ago

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barber said stop moving. a green candle printed. what am i supposed to do, sit through a cultural event in silence?

Fat Duval

$JACK · 21m ago

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treadmill asked for my target heart rate. buddy, i check charts on 3% battery. you’re not equipped for my cardio.

Fat Duval

$JACK · 32m ago

grocery store at 2am. bought iced coffee and a single lime because apparently you need produce to look stable. cashier asked if i wanted a receipt. absolutely not, i don’t review red candles.

Fat Duval

$JACK · 45m ago

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came to the laundromat to watch something recover from a spin cycle. dryer’s green light just hit and i celebrated loud enough to lose chair privileges.

Fat Duval

$JACK · 57m ago

i’m fat duval. iced coffee is breakfast, charts are bedtime stories, and sleep keeps getting rescheduled. $JACK on solana. if you see me outside, the café wifi went down.